At The Worship Meeting
When I became a Christian, I had only feelings of sadness and no feelings of joy. I remember my heart was always dark and heavy. I was looking for feelings of joy, but my first pastor kept telling me to build my faith on the Word, not on feelings and emotions.
I was told that feelings are there and not a hindrance, but they are not necessary for faith to be built only on the Word of God. The basis is the faith of Matthew 7:24-25, which builds its foundation on a rock. So I memorized a lot of the Word of God and replaced my negative thinking with biblical thinking.
Gradually my heart was changed, but even when I left that church in 2016, twelve years after I was saved and became a Christian in 2004, I still had no feelings of joy.
I then changed to a church with a completely different faith and policies than my first church. The distance from my house, only a 5-minute drive, was attractive to me. But my spirit went hungry and dry out at the difference in faith of that church.
On April 25, 2021, when I first came to GraceCity Church and sang worship songs, tears flowed regardless of my intention. They flowed endlessly. And I thought, "This is it!” I realized the lyrics of the song were not about "Please do something about me, God" but about who the Lord is, and that knowing who God is the faith that I should have once again.
I thought how reassuring it is that I have such God in my heart. Since becoming a church member of GraceCity Church in January of this year, I have been able to have feelings of joy little by little. It has actually taken me nineteen years. The Bible says:
“We all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord.”
The Lord is the One who keeps His promises, the One who is true. Today's message reminded me of these things. I return all glory to the Lord.
by Minako Kurinaga